Tag Archives: Mother’s Day

The Reality of Mother’s Day

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We always hope things are real.  We tell ourselves that things are real.  That we wouldn’t be here if the things that happen are not real.

It is surreal that bodies are left here when a person dies and passes on.  It is surreal that people will use a gun to kill.  It is surreal that guns are manufactured when it is obvious people do not treat them as toys, but as a real way to kill people.

Why is life like this?  What do we consider is alive and what do we consider is worth living for?

From a scientist’s point of view, things that rely on each other, as in being in an eco-system, are things (organisms) that are alive.  As for the polar opposite, the solar system, not one thing in it (except earth) is actually alive.  It exists in a rhythmic, inanimate, and up to mathematical accuracy like many cogs working in a beautiful machine.

It seems the reality is that we do not only live for the best things in life.  Things  get in the way, and immediately, we return the supposed blow to our ego and esteem with an equal and greater blow.  What starts this continuous cycle?  And why do we rely on each other like this?

I was at a lunch meeting the other day, and even in the civilized and sophisticated office that I work in, we were all together eating lunch and uninhibitedly trading bits of gossip.  I mean, I can only brag about my children only oh so much before I look like I’m obsessed with them.

We had booked the day to both eat and also make use of our time to plan and discuss the issues for our next project.  Several times through the meeting, opinions of the ideas and possible creations that we wanted to make and deal with were brought up, and also, summarily batted down.  I do not doubt that some of the members of our team, had worked hard to try to make their ideas and plans the one that would fly.

I am not saying that this hasn’t happened to me, but it seems to just be the smaller version of the large-eco-system reality that we are surrounded by and live in.  Where some people will use threat and force to deal with a negative reception, others will keep a careful  diary of a “track record” and use this as leverage for job loss or being looked over for a promotion.  And, of course, there is just plain blows to the ego.  And how long and how many times can someone just sit through peers’ negative comments and bullying?

So, why is this reality? Are we helping to shape the world as it will be?  A century from now?  Are we encouraging merit?  Or, are we just encouraging the same old Earth that has been here millions of years, because, quite frankly, it just won’t change?

I am hoping there is something called “Evolution.”  It sounds to me like the answer to Earth’s burgeoning problems.  Charles Darwin studied animals, and found that they, even with their limited brain size, were capable of change and gain. Sure, they were nothing like human beings, but because they responded to changes in their environment, slowly, they were changing the next generation, if not changing their own very entrenched behaviors, at the moment they responded.  Soon, species of animals were created, and new breeds were found and the animal kingdom grew and flourished.

Human beings, being capable of planned thought, unfortunately, are not responding as positively to pressures and change.  We keep doing and keep thinking like all the generations previous to ours….  Well, why?  Because nothing at all has actually changed!

So, we, reading that our ancestors used swords to settle problems, we will us knives and guns to allay ours.  We will bully, because reading how well it works, we know how to do it and make it work ourselves.  Have you thought of a better way of doing things?  Even if I wanted to be a one-woman-band, and declare a brand new way of living, clean of blood, sweat and death, no one would actually listen.  I would be ostracized as a problem, and considered dealt with.

Mother’s Day is this weekend, and like everyone else, I love Mother’s Day, because I have a mother I love.  I would never bully my mother.  I would never call her bad names.  I will never stick her in a god-forsaken hole when she grows old and feeble, as I want to take care of her.  At least this is something that exists in a very real way.  We are all children, and therefore we all have mothers and fathers.  There reality of life is that we get tired of loving.  And the reality is that we become embroiled in wars instead.  It is a quick way to make life work and a quick way to make some money on it, without ties that bind in forever bondage.

Those Special Days

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I love the days that are special days.  I look forward to the coming day, planning events and getting all the perfect bits and pieces that make the day, the time, and the people, important.  This method of living through the calendar days requires accumulating “things.”  It is not these “things” that are important in and of themselves, but the people, the event, and the time that they are associated with.  Specifically, this year, as by coincidence, Mother’s Day and my brother-in-law’s birthday fall on the same day.  At this point, I am already half-way through thinking, planning, and purchasing “the things” that will fill this “double-day.”

More and more, I am attracted to those things that are more artistic.  I will buy a book full of words that are pretty and that tell a decorative story, rather than any story that is full of thrill and complex mathematical  problems that require suspending belief in the real world.  I prefer a few well-placed words, to a book that I can’t put down.  So, now, when I start the “accumulation of things” for “the special days” in the calendar, some, “tasteless, bland, white” card, figurine, book, and ecetera  is what I will look for, and usually it is what I get.

Part of my plan, which is a new criteria that developed only during the past year, is to try to fit the purchases of “the things” inside of a budget.  I wan to get to the day, with something that says, more “special, loved, and cherished” than any other day.  So, what I spend on the other deadline days in the calendar, should, not be able to compete with the “special days” and the amount I spend.  There is no way the money I spend can indeed reciprocate and represent the “specialness.”

How do I do this?  I have recently discovered “niche marketing” and the “niche market.”  I am finding more “hand-made” things, and “one-of-a-kind” things, in little shops that do not compete in anyway with giant marketplaces like William Sonoma and Crate and Barrel.  There, I can endlessly spend money, but rarely am I satisfied with the “thing” I have bought.

Being without a car, has led me to here, in my journey.  Because I have to walk, I try to fit everything I need to do, within a small radius of space.  And, I have discovered, the stores along those trendy streets, where the designers go, where the artists live and sell, and where things close to home are on sale, for a reasonable price, I can fulfill my wishes and desires… all in a small radius of a walk.

Also, I am a fan of those reality shows that average joe professionals host, and sometimes, compete with each other in.  It is a community that shows up on television at least once a week, and I am usually there, watching.

My hurrays for all the up-and-coming niche markets!  I feel I live a rich life and that I live it in reality.  I am comfortable and I am surrounded by all the comfortable things, which, for some reason, have to be earned through graduating from school and finding a way to make a living.  If this, is in fact, the real world, then, I give my hurrays again.  There are more and more…  One day, I too, will join with the “cottage industry” and end up on the trendy street.  I won’t only be giving on those special days, but I will also receive as much as I give.